Home › Forums › Enchanting Business Blogging – Spring 2014 › Group B › Mike – Module 3 › Reply To: Mike – Module 3
These are the passive sentences you could change:
The key to adding another location is having a business model that can be replicated.
=> The key to adding another location is (having) a business model you can replicate.
The strength of your business was concentrated on the owner
=> The owner himself was the critical success factor of his business.
I’ll bet you will be enlightened, as well as delighted.
=> This one is also passive, but I’d say it’s fine. I wouldn’t change it.
By the way, with a couple of sentences I feel you’re not talking to Joe anymore, but to fellow consultants – this seems the case for your opening sentence, and also when you say “Sometimes you have to tell a client what he needs to hear, not what he wants to hear.”
Good work, Mike.
Enchant readers. Woo customers. Win business.